Three Key Things: If that wasn’t rock bottom for the Oilers then I don’t know what is

The only positive thing to come out of last night’s disastrous loss is that Jason Gregor now has to grow his hair out for the next seven months. He was so damned sure that the Oilers were going to beat the Sharks that he made a bet that will turn out to be arguably the best part of this season. Sure, the team we love may be a garbage fire in every way, but at least we’ll get to watch Gregor’s new look evolve over the rest of the season. Frankly, I’d be way more mad about losing to San Jose had it not been for his incredible generosity. I think he’s going to look incredible. The content will be fantastic.

THE SECOND PERIOD WAS INFURIATING

As much as the first period was angering for the way the Oilers outshot the Sharks and just couldn’t score, the second period drove me insane because of the way the boys completely took their foot off the gas for the first 17 minutes. I know the stats say the Oilers finished the period with 10 shots on goal, but that total was only at three until the clock started winding down. Did they see the time was running out and started throwing pucks on net as a means of catching up? It was like they felt the job was done after Darnell Nurse tied the game in the first couple of minutes and decided to take the rest of the period off. I don’t understand how they can look like a respectable hockey club for 20 minutes only to stop caring all together for the

OUTSHOOTING SOMEONE EARLY IS COOL, BUT SCORING IS COOLER

I don’t know how to accurately express how annoying it is to watch the Oilers outshoot their opponent by a 2:1 margin early in the game, only to find themselves down at the intermission. For the second straight game, the Oilers heavily outshot the opposition — I’m not saying it was a great start for Edmonton by any means, I’m just talking about SOG — but instead of getting any of them past Blackwood, they got goalie’d until eventually giving up the first goal of the night. I don’t know what kind of voodoo is hanging over the Oilers right now, but this group couldn’t score if their lives depended on it, and I’m starting to believe that we need some kind of exorcism.

OTHER THINGS WORTH MENTIONING

• Anyone else feel like this was the last time we’ll see Jay Woodcroft? It should be Ken Holland that gets fired, but it’ll probably be Woody that pays the price first.
• I won’t lie to you fine folks when I say that being down by a goal to the San Jose Sharks after 20 minutes was both hysterically funny to me and deeply depressing at the same time. I will also admit that it was just as funny and sad when they did it again midway through the second period. When the Sharks went up by two goals in the third period, it stopped being so funny.
• I couldn’t even get excited about the Ryan Nugent-Hopkins goal. Nothing but numbness. We have reached the darkest timeline, friends.
• Is Connor McDavid okay? He’s very un-McDavid like right now, and I just want to know that he’s alright.
• The weird thing about seeing Stuart Skinner give up three goals on 18 shots is that it’s hard to blame him for much. Leading up to the goals was an array of bad reads, giveaways, and horrible luck, but that still doesn’t take the sting off the fact that Stu finished the night with 15 saves and a .833 save%. That’s just not good enough.
• How is the Oilers’ power play so bad? They struck out on all four of their opportunities with the man advantage, and it’s completely puzzling to watch them struggle with what has been a clear strength over the last few years.
• You’ve been waiting long enough for me to tell you that the Oilers won 43.1% of the faceoffs.
• If you’re a fan of the Corskis, you’ll be happy to know that the Oilers outshot the Sharks by a 41-18 margin. It didn’t matter at all,  but that’s what happened.
• It was a missed opportunity on our end that we didn’t have a live camera set up on Jason Gregor for the game.

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